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Of Shettima, cows and goats | By Festus Adedayo

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Yoruba have a solemn way of expressing disgust with vacuity. Wherever elders look forward, in huge expectation, that a respected person would utter words of knowledge – ogbon but its antonym – ago comes from that otherwise venerated mouth, they are downcast. Conversely, wherever ago is expected and ogbon is manifested, it elicits respect and high acclamation. Recently, American president, Joe Biden, was picturesque ogbon. Recall that, arising from his attempt to overturn the outcome of the 2020 presidential election, President Donald Trump faced trial on a litany of felony charges. His trial was considered turning point in American legal history. In the process, a historic mug shot of him was released by a Georgia courthouse. It instantly became a global talk issue and a veritable muse for various artistic creations and merchandise.

T-shirts, posters, mugs, shot glasses and even bobblehead dolls got creatively embossed with the Trump mug shot. In the shot, the American president was captured donning a red tie, gleaming hair, and wearing on his face like a visor his traditional scowl, like one who stepped on excrement. As he stepped out of an exercise at Lake Tahoe, accosted by reporters for his impression of Trump’s mug shot, Biden had smiled and, as reported by Bloomberg, said, “Handsome guy, wonderful guy.”

A “handsome and wonderful guy” remark on an indictee’s mug shot, one probably on his way to jail, was every inch an unkindest cut. In literature, Biden’s remarks share same texture with an irony, euphemism or litotes. You could even be pardoned if you call it an antiphrasis, a rhetorical device where one who utters it means the opposite of what he says, in such a way that it is obvious to anyone who hears it what the speaker’s intention is. Western leaders use expressions like this a lot. They are called ice cream words, as opposed to the infelicity of hot, burning reactions that end up promoting hatred, animosity and division. The recipient of the word is hurt as they had been hit right in the middle of their hearts, yet the words appear harmless and gentlemanly. The words say very little yet have sent innumerous arrows piercing the heart of the matter and the soul of their victims.

The Biden path doesn’t excite most Nigerian leaders. They find wisdom in ago. Like last week. Nigeria’s Vice-President Kashim Shettima, against the run of play, had stormed the Appeal Court in Abuja, venue of the Presidential Election Petition Tribunal, (PEPT) to witness the delivery of judgment. Forget many insinuations thrown at his attendance. Some mischief makers said his presence was meant to make personal eye contacts with the judges. Some said it was to intimidate them. Others said it was a reflection of the certainty of the presidency’s suasion that the result would go its way. Anyway, Shettima sat through the tiresome rigour of waiting to hear the last of the justices’ pronouncements which lasted for almost a whole day. He was flanked by Umaru Ganduje, party chairman, ministers and the National Security Adviser (NSA).

Presidential candidates of the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) and Labour Party (LP) in the last February 25 elections, Atiku Abubakar and Peter Obi, had appealed against the declaration of the APC candidate in the said election as winner and president of Nigeria. After their Lord Justices had declared the APC candidate winner of the election, Shettima then spoke to the press, haughtiness, conceit and his obsession for bombast crowding his face. “We are not going to retire Atiku to Dubai or Morocco. I’d retire him to Fombina. I’d buy him goats, broilers and layers, so that he can spend his days rearing cows and broilers,” he had said of the man who had just been declared loser of the election by the court.

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So, was Shettima trying to cast aspersion on Fulani rule, Kanuris’ historic clash with Uthman Fodio’s Fulani nomads and all they represent? Was it a referencing of today’s “conquest” by Kanuris, manifest in his vice presidency, of the progenies of Fodio, almost two hundred years after Fodio’s hijra and jihad on the animist Kanuris of Bornu? Or was Shettima simply referencing Fombina, the southlands, an earliest name for the emirate south of Bornu and Sokoto? Or, the place of the Kanuris who, even in the twelfth and thirteenth centuries, led the famous Kanem Bornu Empire, with a Kanuri leadership of the empire?

Apparently immediately realizing the indecency of such outburst, Shettima attempted to apply some soothing balm. He then went into a paraphrased history of what he called the socio-cultural interaction between the Fulanis and Kanuris of northern Nigeria, which he incongruously flaunted as justification for the liberty he took to dress the former vice president in such infelicity. That interaction, Shettima said, was reason why Abubakar could not complain that a far younger but brusque holder of a temporary political power took liberty to dress him in such a despicable robe. “He’d stoically bear,” Shettima said in a re-rendition of Shakespearean lingo.

Since appearing on the dais of political leadership in Nigeria, Shettima has struggled to present himself as a polished, urbane and gentlemanly northern politician. A few weeks ago, he was in Ibadan, the capital of Oyo State, for the wedding of Ibukun, daughter of Prof. Folusho Okunmadewa, who the VP called “my beloved teacher.” Cosseted on both sides by the state’s Deputy Governor, Adebayo Lawal; Bornu governor, Babagana Zulum and former Minister of Health, Prof. Isaac Adewole, Shettima lauded the ancient city as “a home” and where he learned to turn everything that comes his way into an opportunity. Waxing and walzing in poetics, the VP dazzled the audience with the ancient lines of John Pepper Clark’s Ibadan.

“As I look around this room, I’m not only reminded of a city that has woven its culture, values and aspirations deep into my being, but also of how fate has played a part in expanding relationships and families. I’m privileged to not only draw from this intellectual oasis of the University of Ibadan, but also to identify as a member of the family and as a qualified son of the soil,” he said.

Shettima manifests this image of a man obsessed with books and knowledge. On a February 21, 2017 trip to Oslo as governor of Borno State, he had reportedly gone shopping. The Paleet shopping center, a famous mall at Karl Johans gate, opposite the royal palace of the Norwegian monarchy in the city of Oslo and in particular, a store called Tanum, was where he headed. He had told the store keeper that he needed books and his areas of interest were non-fiction, leadership, biographies, politics, history, economies, education and culture of different societies and nations. A few weeks ago, representing President Bola Tinubu at the 2023 BRICS summit in South Africa, his media aide reported how Shettima took a detour from the conference to a bookstore. He searched the city of Pretoria for books which the aide said was manifestation of “his unquenchable thirst for books, intellectual curiosity, and insightful perspectives on writers and subjects… topics spanned domains ranging from economics and philosophy to the intricate realm of politics… a personal philosophy regarding acquiring books in the cities he journeyed through.”

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While the run-up to the 2023 elections was acquiring feverish pitch, Shettima suddenly epitomized the culture shock that Ugandan poet, Okot p’Bitek, attempted to convey in his famous poem, Song of Lawino. Standing in for Tinubu at the Nigerian Bar Association (NBA) conference of 2022, also graced by then presidential candidates, Abubakar and Obi, Shettima was outfitted in attire that poignantly spoke to his attempts at going off the handle in his acquired self-sureness of western book knowledge. This was in palpable juxtaposition to the saber-rattling of his war-mongering Kanuri roots. Outfitted in black suit and red tie on top of a pair of gym shoes, Shettima stirred uncomplimentary reactions that froze social media. On his Twitter page, an ex-presidential aide, Reno Omokri had asked, “Who in his right mind wears a suit and tie and then puts on a pair of gym shoes to a conference?”

First published in 1966 in Luo and translated into English, Song of Lawino contributed to debates on the place and future of Africa in a world where there is a growing gravitation towards the knowledge of books and abandonment of the values, mores and bequeathals from our African forebears. With pungent graphic metaphor and a grammatical intensity that catches attention of the reader, p’Bitek demonstrates the imminent conflict between modern civilization and tradition. It was narrated as dialogue between Lawino and her husband, Ocol. Ocol abandons his wife and in the name of Europeanization, marries a woman who answers to archetypal Europe. p’Bitek asks such germane questions about the nature of Africa’s liberation like, should Africans defer to pre-colonial acquired tradition or adapt to European values? Such conflict must have hit Shettima at the NBA conference.

Anyway, what exactly was Shettima trying to convey by that queer “We are not going to retire Atiku to Dubai or Morocco. I’d retire him to Fombina. I’d buy him goats, broilers and layers, so that he can spend his days rearing cows and broilers”? Was he in a way making reference to Derek Walcott’s Goats and Monkeys, one of the poems in the collection, The Castaway and Other Poems? Derek Alton Walcott, a Saint Lucian, West Indies poet and playwright, was a Nobel Prize winner. The poem under reference is a commentary on master-slave relationship and symbolically themed to reflect rulers and the ruled. Reference to goats and monkeys in the poem was an obvious allusion to Shakespeare’s Othello.

The reference to cow is even curiouser. Fulani have a historic dalliance with cows. The most notorious of the examples was Muhammadu Buhari who, even as Nigeria’s president, maintained an almost romantic and incestuous relationship with his herd of cattle, at the expense of the wellbeing of the people he was sworn in to protect. In that threat to buy Atiku cows, so that he could return to the traditional profession of his kith and kin, was Shettima making tribal denigration or affirming ethnic ascendancy or supremacy?

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All in all, Shettima’s walk down the aisle of inappropriate imageries and anecdotes does not portray him as the cultured book-reading northern leader that he has struggled all this while to convey. On the reverse, it casts him in the mould of the disappointment encountered by Yoruba elders from men who were expected to mirror sterner stuff of wisdom and civilization in utterances. If the vice president was seized – seize again! – by the usual Aso Rock spirit of incalculable excitement at the APC win in court, books, tomes of which he is reputed to have stockpiled in his brain, should have taught him the need for précis and culture. None of these did he exhibit outside the Appeal Court on Wednesday.

While Shettima and the APC are celebrating APC’s electoral victory in the court, traditional rukus on alleged impartiality of the judiciary reigns. The fear of judicial corruption has always surrounded Nigeria’s electoral firmament. It didn’t begin today. The 1979, 1983, 1999 elections, even down to the present time, quaked under quests for electoral justice. Rather than mourn the turn of the face of justice today, we all must opt for an activist fight for a total reform of our electoral laws. For instance, a president who reserves the power to appoint the INEC chairman and its commissioners cannot but retain a rope to manipulate the swings of electoral geography. Let us sever every twine that links electoral umpire to the presidency. It is key to impartiality.

Second, let us tinker with the constitutional provision which requires a candidate for the office of the Nigerian president to receive just a mere plurality of national votes and over 25% of the votes in at least 24 of the 36 states. Tinubu’s 8,794,726 total votes, representing 36.61%, Atiku’s 6,984,520, 29.07% and Obi’s 6,101,533 which represents 25.40% of total votes are too unrepresentative of Nigerians, so much that winners who claim to have been given legitimacy of office actually have none. Between the three of them, they represent a tiny percentage of votes cast and the general population of Nigeria. Anyone who wants to be Nigeria’s president should not score less than 51% of votes cast, the constitutional requirement in many African countries. Those are the issues I think we should address, moving forward.

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OYO101: ADELABU— When will this generational ‘UP NEPA’ chant stop?| By Muftau Gbadegesin

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The Minister of Power, Oloye Bayo Adelabu, has apologized for lashing out at Nigerians over poor energy management.

I hope Nigerians, especially our people from Oyo state, forgive and overlook his Freudian slip. Given that apology, I believe the minister has realized his mistakes and will subsequently act accordingly. In days that followed the minister’s vituperation, many otherwise cool-headed and easy-going observers quickly joined the band of critics and cynics. By the way, what BAND do you think those critics belonged to?

Plus, how best do you describe kicking someone who is down already? The flurry of condemnation that followed Oloye Adelabu’s ‘AC-Freezer’ sermon must have surprised and shocked him. Instead of sticking to his prepared speech, he decided to dash off by telling Nigerians some home truth. Quite amusingly, the truth, it turns out, is not the truth Nigerians want to hear. And as they say, ‘There is your truth, my truth, and the Truth.’ The fact is that Nigerians are angry at many things, the sudden hike in electricity tariff being one.

Perhaps the Minister’s press conference, an avenue to calm fraying nerves and address critical issues, quickly congealed into an arena for an intellectual dogfight – if you watch the video, you will hear the murmur that rented the air the moment that terse statement was uttered. While some influencers tried to downplay the minister’s jibe, they were instead flogged in their whitewashing game. Frankly, I am not interested in the minister and the energy management brouhaha. What I am indeed interested in is what the ministry and minister are doing to restore light in a country where darkness has permeated much of its landscape – don’t mind the confusion the minister and the ministry have created to disrupt the conversation around that vital sector of the economy.

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‘Up NEPA’, Lol

Trust Nigerians. When the defunct National Electric Power Authority failed to end the perennial and persistent darkness in the country, it was ironically dubbed ‘Never Expect Power Always.’ And when the company morphed into PHCN, Nigerians berated the name change, saying the company would hold more power than it would release. True to that assumption, PHCN indeed held more power than it gave to the people.

Then, in 2013, Nigerians woke up to the news of DISCOs, GENCOS, GASCOs, and so on. DISCOs for distribution companies, GENCOs for generating companies, and Gascos for gas suppliers. Of all these critical value chains, only DISCOs were handed down to private enterprises. Think of IBEDC, AEDC, IEDC, BEDC, etc. Unfortunately, the privatization of the distribution chain hasn’t transformed the sector’s fortune for good. More interested in the money but less motivated to do the dirty work of revamping the infrastructure.

Like a typical Nigerian in a ‘band E’ environment, I grew up chanting the ‘Up NEPA’ mantra whenever power is restored at home – and I am not alone in this mass choir. As a rural boy, the ‘Up NEPA’ chant is etched into our skulls from time immemorial. Sometimes, you can’t even tell when you start to join the chorus; you only know that you say it automatically and auto-magisterially. Many years down the lane, the persistent power cuts, blackouts, and grid collapses have worsened. And under Minister Adelabu, power supply, based on my little experience, has never reached this depressing point in history.

As a content creator, I can tell you Oloye Adelabu may likely go down in history as the most inconsequential minister of power unless something drastic is done to restore people’s confidence and bring about a steady, stable, frequent, and regular power supply. You may have seen on social media how most Nigerians who migrated abroad often find it difficult to shed that ‘Up NEPA’ chant from themselves once a power cut is fixed in those countries. Like the rest of their countrymen, they have internalized that mantra. Only after they’ve acclimatized to their new environment would they become healed of that verbal virus ultimately.

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‘Adelabu, end this chant’

This is a challenge. In my column welcoming Oloye Adelabu into the critical ministry of power, I asked a rhetorical question: Can Adelabu end the penkelemesi in the power sector? In Nigeria, is there any other economic sector troubled by multidimensional and multifaceted peculiar messes than the power sector? Adelabu’s grandfather, Adegoke Adelabu, was nicknamed Penkelemesi. History has it that the colonial masters, tired of that Ibadan politician, decided to describe him in the punchiest way possible: a peculiar mess. Quickly, a peculiar mess spread across like wildfire: the white men have described Adegoke as a peculiar mess. Translated to Yoruba, we have Penkelemesi. In retrospect, the minister must have realized the situation he met on the ground is better than what is obtainable now. He needs to own up, chin up, and take full responsibility for this total blackout.

‘Minister Fashola’

Babatunde Fashola, SAN is a clever man. For four years as minister of power, he avoided cutting controversy. But long before he was appointed, he had stirred quite an expectation around fixing the rot in the sector. He had jokingly said his party, the APC, would resolve the crisis of perennial blackout in one fell swoop. He categorically gave a timeline of when Nigerians in the cities and villages will start to enjoy regular power supply: six months. After four years of setbacks, Minister Fashola was forced to eat his vomit: the power crisis in Nigeria is deep-seated and chaotic. Oloye Adelabu has made more enemies than friends in less than a year. The minister may survey his performance among Nigerians to test this hypothesis. The truth is the truth. The mismatch between the minister’s area of competence and his assigned portfolio hasn’t helped matters as well. And this is a cavity many of his critics and traducers are banking on.

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For the first time in decades, Adelabu stands on the threshold of history: will he end this generational ‘UP NEPA’ chant once and for all? Time will tell.

OYO101 is Muftau Gbadegesin’s opinion about issues affecting the Oyo state. He can be reached via @muftaugbade on X, muftaugbadegesin@gmail.com, and 09065176850.

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Yahaya Bello: Do we need to prosecute ex-govs?

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I followed the drama of unimaginable scenes that unfolded in Abuja last week, as the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission(EFCC) moved to arrest and arraign the immediate past governor of Kogi State, Alhaji Yahaya Bello, in respect of alleged mismanagement of funds. I called it a drama of unimaginable scenes because the EFCC had laid siege to the house since very early in the day, knowing that its target, the “White Lion of Kogi State” was holed up somewhere in the compound.

But before the very eyes of the EFCC operatives, the man they had waited all day to catch, just slipped off their hands effortlessly. They claimed that he was rescued by his cousin, the incumbent governor of the state, Usman Ododo, who is protected by constitutional immunity. But EFCC lawyers would claim that Section 12 of the Administration of Criminal Justice Act (ACJA) empowers the body to break into houses to effect arrest.

Maybe that’s a story for another day. But it was surprising they didn’t think of that option. Bello was said to have stayed put in the Government House Lokoja since indication emerged that the EFCC was on his trail. So the easiest thing for the Kogi governor to do was to drive into the troubled house and then fish out a troubled cousin.

The Yahaya Bello saga is just the latest drama between the EFCC and former governors. Some time ago, we witnessed the Ayo Fayose drama. The former Ekiti State governor, whom EFCC was unable to arrest while in office put up some drama when he arrived at EFCC’s office wearing a branded ‘T’ shirt with the inscription: “EFCC I’m here.” Some of his loyalists helped him with things he needed to use in the EFCC detention.

Aside from that, we have also witnessed the Willie Obiano saga. The former governor of Anambra State was accused of misappropriating the state’s funds and has since been taken to court. Immediately after handing over the reins of power in Awka, the man had planned to jet out of the country but had to be stopped as EFCC operatives grabbed him at that exit point. We were also witnesses to the back and forth between the former Governor Abdulaziz Yari of Zamfara State and the EFCC. The commission had accused Yari of mismanaging billions of Naira and moved to arraign him.

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There were accusations and counter-accusations until Yari landed in the Senate, and things became quiet. The drama between the ex-Imo State governor, Rochas Okorocha, was interesting while it lasted. The commission had laid siege to the residence and eventually entered through the roof. We saw a terrified Okorocha and his household, praying fervently for God’s intervention as operatives jumped in to grab their suspect.

The list I have above is by no means exhaustive of the dramatic exchanges between the EFCC and some former governors accused of one financial misdeed or the other in recent years. One thing is, however, common to all the cases, after the the initial bubbles, the whole thing dies down as the retreating waves. Next to nothing is heard of the cases as the neck-breaking snail-speed of the nation’s judicial system takes over. Year after year, it is about one injunction or the other. Many of the accused had gone ahead to seek elective posts and won, many others have taken appointments and the law cannot stop them from utilising the benefits of the allegedly looted resources to gain an advantage since our laws presume individuals innocent until proven guilty.

The books of the EFCC and the Independent Corrupt Practices and Other Related Offences Commission (ICPCC) are full of such individuals who have allegations of hundreds of billions of Naira hanging on their necks. Many of them are busy swinging the official chairs in government offices as we speak. God forbid, one of such should, gain control of the nation’s presidency one day!

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Well, to forestall such a scary development, I think we need an antidote to these endless anti-corruption trials. The endless trial is not just a drain on the energy of the lady justice. It drills a gaping hole in the state’s resources as well. Imagine the legal charges the state incurs in taking several cases through the layers of courts. It is also possible some of the accused, who are innocent of the accusation could die in the process of trials and thus carry an unnecessary burden of guilt (at least in the eyes of the public) into their graves. The late governor of Oyo State, Otunba Adebayo Alao-Akala was able to win his case against the EFCC after 13 years, he died not long after the ‘not guilty’ verdict was pronounced. Former President of the Senate, Adolphus Wabara was also on the bribe-for-budget case preferred against him for more than ten years. Luckily, he was alive to receive his ‘not guilty’ verdict as well. Some may not be that lucky.

To stem this tide of seemingly endless trials of politically exposed persons, I want to suggest amendments to the EFCC and ICPC Acts to lay much premium on thorough and discreet probes of financial crimes rather than dump the results of the investigations in the court, the suspects should be called in and shown the traces of the illegally taken funds and their destinations. If the suspect is ready to refund at least two-thirds of the stolen funds to the coffers of the government, the agency involved, under the supervision of a competent court, could sign an irrevocable non-disclosure agreement and collect the funds into a special basket created for that purpose and which will be used for infrastructural development.

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Such an agreement should also take care of any possible penchant for grandstanding by any politician who could mount the podium one day and claim never to have been indicted of financial crimes. As much as the government would not waste time and resources prosecuting him or her, he should also be barred from active politics and playing godfather roles. If we do this, we will not only save time and resources, but we will get back a sizeable amount of the looted funds into government coffers for developmental purposes.

By Taiwo Adisa

This piece was first Published By Sunday Tribune, April 21, 2024.

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Tinubu’s Naira Miracle: Abracadabra or Economic Wizardry? | By Adeniyi Olowofela

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Prior to assuming the presidency of Nigeria, Asiwaju Bola Ahmed Tinubu garnered the confidence of the majority of Nigerians with the promise of rescuing the country’s economy from the impending disaster it faced.

For the past 43 years, the Naira has been steadily depreciating against the Dollar, as illustrated in Figure One.

The graphs below unequivocally depict the exponential rise of the Naira against the Dollar from 1979 to 2022. This sustained upward trend would have theoretically resulted in the Naira reaching 2,500 Naira to one Dollar by now.

 

 

This situation led some individuals to hoard dollars in anticipation of profiting from further devaluation of the Naira.

However, under President Bola Tinubu’s leadership, the Nigerian federal government successfully halted the expected decline of the Naira.

The Naira has appreciated to 1,200 Naira to a Dollar (Figure 2), contrary to the projected 2,500 Naira to one Dollar, based on the exponential pattern observed in Figure One.

This achievement demonstrates unprecedented economic prowess. If this trajectory continues, the Naira may appreciate to 500 Naira against 1 Dollar before the conclusion of President Bola Tinubu’s first term in 2027.

While the purchasing power of the average Nigerian remains relatively low, there is a palpable sense of hope on the rise.

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It is hoped that the Economic Team advising the President will continue their efforts to stabilize the economy and prevent its collapse until Nigeria achieves economic prosperity.

The government’s ability to reverse the Naira’s free fall within a year can be likened to a remarkable feat, reminiscent of a lizard falling from the top of an Iroko tree unscathed, then nodding its head in self-applause.

Mr. President, we applaud your efforts.

 

Prof. Adeniyi Olowofela, the Commissioner representing Oyo State at the Federal Character Commission (FCC), writes from Abuja.

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