Opinion
Pantami: Buhari’s terrorism-canceling in name of region and religion

On Christmas day in 2009, Nigeria’s Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, aged 23, having been born December 22, 1986, attempted to detonate plastic explosives that were hidden in his underwear. He had boarded a Northwest Airlines Flight 253 heading from Amsterdam to Detroit, Michigan, with 289 passengers on board. Providence however rescued those souls as the explosives refused to explode, burning instead Abdulmutallab’s laps and genitalia. About three years after, on February 16, 2012, a United States federal court convicted him on eight counts bordering on his criminality. These included an attempt to unleash a weapon of mass destruction. Abdulmutallab got a term of sentencing for life and another 50 years without parole. Since then, he has been sequestered at the ADX Florence federal prison in Colorado, America.
I will return to this grisly narrative presently.
Whenever the west cites the 64 AD example of Nero fiddling while Rome was burning, Nigeria goes into historical kitty to flaunt hers. The fiddling Nero is a classical example of governmental neglect of duty and focus on frivolities. Or trivialities. Nigeria’s own Nero is the story of the first and only Prime Minister in the history of Nigeria, Abubakar Tafawa Balewa. As Muhammadu Buhari sits cross-legged and picking his teeth in search of some interloping strands of meat, 57 years ago, Balewa did same. Separated by several kilometers in their places of ancestry, Balewa’s Bauchi several Sahelian deserts away from Buhari’s Daura, both leaders are however tragically united by their gross insouciance to raging matters of state. Nigeria is today literally being consumed by a ball of fire in form of ricochets of guns booming in virtually every state of the country. Buhari is however not aware. As Baal, god of the Sidonians, lapsed into bothersome silence, even as 450 of its prophets invoked its spirit on Mount Carmel, Buhari has slid into his characteristic sleep, dead to the tinder of fire that is burning Nigeria.
Backtrack to 1963 and 1964 Nigeria. The national census and the 1964 Federal Elections had thrown the country into a bedlam. This was garnished by blood flowing from the orgy of killings in the Western Region. Balewa however chose to little the acrimonious and vengeful spillage of blood. In June, 1964, as he toured Benin, just like Buhari’s hirelings placed the blame of the Nigerian conflagration on the media, Balewa too said he could not judge the intensity of lawlessness in the West on account of newspaper reports of the brigandage. Balewa was unworried and unconcerned about the slide. As he departed Nigeria for Accra to attend an OAU meeting in October, 1965 at the Ikeja airport, the Prime Minister cynically told a reporter who asked if he wasn’t bothered by the fire raging through the western region that, “Ikeja is part of the West and I cannot see any fire burning.” Exactly two and half months after that statement, specifically on January 15, 1966, that fire he couldn’t see consumed him in Nigeria’s first military coup which ended his life.
As it is, Isa Ali Pantami, Nigeria’s Minister of Communications and Digital Economy, is the fire burning Nigeria now that Buhari too cannot see. Or is pretending not to see. Though with his government’s overt pampering of violence, bandits and insurgents, no one in their right senses expected Buhari to do away with or prosecute Pantami over a truckload of allegations of his insurgency-baiting words in recent past, the way the presidency diffidently told Nigerians to go jump inside the river last Thursday was however benumbing. The cusp it hung its arguments was so baffling that you would wonder if we were indeed not in Balewa’s First Republic. In a release defending Pantami, Buhari, through his Senior Special Assistant, Garba Shehu, said that because Pantami “had been leading the charge against illegal data deductions and pricing… revolutionized government’s virtual public engagement to respond to COVID-19 and save(d) taxpayers’ money… established ICT start-up centres to boost youth entrepreneurship and create jobs… changed policy to ensure locally produced ICT content is used by ministries…(and) deregistered some 9.2 million SIMs – ending the ability for criminals and terrorists to flagrantly use mobile networks undetected,” therefore, allegations that he was hands-in-gloves with insurgency and authored views not different from Abubakar Shekau’s are immaterial. How I wish my late teacher, Prof Campell Shittu Momoh, were here to spank Shehu’s irreverent buttocks for that ill logic and assault on the god of symbolic and deductive logic.
Buhari then leapt into indefensible cants. In doing, this, he made claims that were either deliberately misleading or demonstrative of a government that hypocritically has two different value systems. The release canvassed that, since Pantami made the said violence-baiting words “in the early 2000s,” when “the minister was a man in his twenties” and “next year, he will be 50,” Nigerians should know that “time has passed” and he should not be made to answer for those words. That is decidedly an arithmetic of deceit.
If Pantami canvassed those extremist views in “the early 2000s” and “next year, he will be 50,” a la the presidency, then Pantami made the statements in his thirties in selfsame “the early 2000s.” In very unmistakable manner, that release must have convinced doubting Thomases who didn’t believe that in Buhari’s reckoning, no northern Moslem can do any wrong, in the name of region or religion.
In law, 18 years is the age of responsibility. At that age, a person is deemed to be old enough to carry the cross of his actions, inactions and deeds. But because the Buhari government is so grossly consumed by the hail of nepotism and justification of violence “in the name of region or religion,” Pantami had not crossed that consequential age of responsibility.
If you place Abdulmutallab – the lad whose painful story I narrated above – and his extremist views beside acidic views alleged to have been uttered by Pantami, they share same crimson colour, both united by extremism.
For instance, Abdulmutallab had said, “The Koran obliges every able Muslim to participate in jihad and fight in the way of Allah…I carried the device to avenge the killing of my Muslim brothers and sisters… ” He called the failed explosives laden to his underwear on that flight “blessed weapon” and claimed the motive for wanting to bomb 289 people in the flight as due to “the tyranny of the United States.” Flip to Pantami’s and tell me the difference in them.
What the Buhari justification of Pantami’s extremist views means is that if Abdulmutallab were to have been in Buhari’s Nigeria, his “blossoming youth” would not be “cancelled” as the US did of Abdulmutallab. All he needed to do, according to Buhari, through Shehu, was to promise “he will not repeat them” and “publicly and permanently condemn(ed) his earlier (action) as wrong” and he would be in the clear.
Buhari’s sense of justice is one of the weirdest in human history. While this sense of justice advocates rehabilitation for “repentant” insurgents, it leaves his victim to wallow in pains. It is this same skewed sense of justice which got Buhari to seek the 36 state governments’ lands and water belts for Fulani herdsmen involved in commercial pastoral venture while it is less bothered by the travails of Nigerian poultry farmers whose business is today in comatose due to governmental neglect, “in the name of region and religion.”
Today, terrorism is Nigeria’s major national challenge; of course, spurned by absence of leadership. There is no doubt that Nigeria is bleeding from all her major arteries.
The number of people who have been killed in the last six months should rival the casualty figures in any major war. Nowhere is safe. A couple of days ago, three children among kidnapped students of Greenfield University, Kaduna, were killed like chickens. Bandits are killing in scores in Zamfara. UNHCR, the UN Refugee Agency, claimed that about 65,000 Nigerians were propelled to flee the country following an April 14 series of attacks by armed groups on Damasak, a town located in the north-eastern part of Borno State. Eight people were reported killed with many injured. Same UNHCR claimed that an upsurge of violence that has held the jugular of the Lake Chad Basin has so far uprooted 3.3 million Nigerians from their homes, a figure that includes about 300,000 Nigerian refugees and excludes about 2.2 million others who have been displaced in north-eastern states of Adamawa, Borno and Yobe. In the first quarter of last year, Global Rights Nigeria, an organization that keeps tabs on Nigeria’s cadaver harvest, said that at least 1,416 lives were lost to violence within that period. It is apparent that a quadruple more of that figure has since died. But for Buhari’s defence of region and religion, those people may still be alive today.
To say that Nigeria is a killing field is an understatement. The twin evils of audacity of spillage of blood in major parts of the northern part of Nigeria and the absence of government have lionized renegades in other parts of the country to unleash their terror on defenceless people. Violence has been effectively democratized in all the nooks and crannies of the country, with all the regions competing to outdo one another in the violence roulette.
Nigeria’s Southeast is not left in the orgy of violence. While IPOB inflicts its anger and fury on the Nigerian state, a state of fear grips our compatriots in that enclave. Unidentified anarchists set prisoners free, burn police stations and kill policemen, blinded from the fact that the victims are their own kin. On Thursday last week, the city of Enugu was a bedlam. The New Artisan area had been set on fire. Soldiers from the 2 Division of the Nigerian Army literally took over the Coal City. They strewn up the Otigba Junction Roundabout, even amidst an evening downpour. You would think that there was a coup. Again on Saturday, news came in that the country home of Hope Uzodinma, governor of Imo State, had been set ablaze by suspected hoodlums. They reportedly threw petrol bombs into the house located in Oru East local government area of the state. Sorrows, tears and blood, apologies to Fela Anikulapo Kuti, are the regular trade mark in the Nigeria under Buhari.
While violence has become a recurring decimal in the globe, world leaders are taking steps to track and tame the incubus. Here in Nigeria, there are manifest feelings that the body language of the northern ruling elite, including that of the president, is in support of violence and agents of violence, in the name of region and religion. Right from the days of Goodluck Jonathan, there have been claims that the outlawry that has claimed thousands of lives of Nigerians is being given vent and funded with millions of dollars by powerful men in government who cover their outlawry in wide babanriga. Pantami is the first major identifiable link that Nigeria has had so far to that high-level allegation.
The whole world must be laughing itself silly on account of Nigeria’s Albert Camus absurdity under Buhari. How can a man with such toxic views, which he claimed to have reneged but with scant public evidence, be in charge of Nigeria’s sensitive data ministry:? Christians whose data are in the hands of such a man who advocated their killings in the name of God are as vulnerable as a man who rubbed gasoline on his body and standing beside the mai suya’s red hot iron gauze.
A man who, “in the early 2000s,” a la Buhari’s Shehu, who was then “in his twenties” but allegedly superintended over the killing of a final year student of a university, on allegation that he distributed Christian tracts; who openly expressed a voyeur attraction for Osama bin Laden’s bloodsucking evangelism; who allegedly had dalliance with terrorists and expressed extremist views, is not one you embrace and give a pat in the back, even when he claims he had repented of them. Or even if his brilliance took your country to the moon.
The biblical Saul example that is being hoisted by some felons here is Satanic and inappropriate. Repentance not only comes with genuine confession, sobriety and contriteness, the repentee (pardon my invention) is still not unaccountable to the repentor (again, pardon, please) which in this case is the Nigerian state, for the crime of his past, once he is within the radius of the age of crime liability. As exhibited in the sentencing of the policeman who killed America’s George Floyd last week, the arc of the universe is tilted towards justice. Nigeria’s shouldn’t tilt towards bloodshed and mindless justification of blood-baiting felons, in the name of region and religion.
Rather than come out with a blanket shawl covering Pantami, the first step of a government that is not allied to blood-letting should be to ask its minister accused of wearing an apparel soaked in blood of innocent people to step aside for thorough investigation. Many have said that, judging by alleged health challenge of the president which necessitates proxy governance of Nigeria, many of the governmental decisions attributed to him, including the Garba Shehu release on Pantami, Buhari is everything but aware of them. They might have been decisions taken by powerful proxies, Buhari having retreated into his inscrutable and inaccessible world.
There is no doubt that, as Garba Shehu argued, powerful conglomerates and persons might have escalated the Pantami riddle because his ministerial decisions took oily morsels from their throats. When such victimizers unleash a mob on their victims, only God can come to their rescue. However, Pantami is not denying many of these blood-dripping claims. The presidency may argue in favour of the timing of the hail of allegations against its anointed ministerial son but not its veracity, nor the age of responsibility for crime. It is not judicially empowered to so do.
By this wooly shawl spread round Pantami to cover the blood oozing out of his hands, Buhari is audaciously saying, 57 years after Balewa: “Ikeja is part of the West and I cannot see any fire burning.” Well, he will have his Pantami retained as minister. The carnage on innocent Nigerians will continue. History reveals however that when leaders like this think it is peace and safety, destruction sidles in at night like a fox. Blood is spiritual and shedding of its corpuscles is like water, it will find its course. Everyone who aids and abets it will be answerable to its burning fury. Blood devours like foxes do to chickens in their pen, leaving in its trail blood, weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth.
Opinion
El-Rufai’s SDP Gambit: A Political ‘Harakiri’ | By Adeniyi Olowofela

Former Governor of Kaduna State, Nasir Ahmad El-Rufai, is a restless and courageous politician. However, he ought to have learned political patience from President Bola Ahmed Tinubu, who spent years building a viable political alternative to the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) when its stalwarts boasted that they would rule Nigeria for 64 years.
Cleverly, Tinubu abandoned the Alliance for Democracy (AD) to establish another political platform, the Action Congress (AC), which later metamorphosed into the Action Congress of Nigeria (ACN).
In collaboration with other political groups—including the Congress for Progressive Change (CPC) and some elements of the PDP—the All Progressives Congress (APC) was born, with El-Rufai as one of its foundation members. Ultimately, the APC wrestled power from the PDP, truncating its 64-year dominance plan.
For El-Rufai to abandon the APC now is nothing short of political suicide, as Tinubu is strategically positioned to secure a second term with an array of both seen and unseen political foot soldiers.
The Social Democratic Party (SDP), as a political entity, effectively died with the late Moshood Kashimawo Olawale (MKO) Abiola. Any attempt to resurrect it is an exercise in futility.
For the sake of argument, let’s consider a hypothetical scenario: Suppose another southern politician is fielded in 2027 and wins the election. Even if he signs an agreement to serve only one term, political realities could shift, and he may seek another four years.
If anyone doubts this, they should ask former Presidents Olusegun Obasanjo and Goodluck Jonathan. The simple implication of this is that President Tinubu remains the best candidate for northern politicians seeking a power shift back to the North in 2031—at which point El-Rufai could have been one of the credible northern contenders for the presidency.
When Ebenezer Babatope (Ebino Topsy), a staunch Awoist, chose to serve in General Sani Abacha’s regime, he later reflected on his decision, saying: “I have eaten the forbidden fruit, and it will haunt me till the end of my life.”
By abandoning the APC for another political party, El-Rufai has also eaten the forbidden fruit. Only time will tell if it will haunt him or not.
However, for some of the political leaders already contacted from the South West, supporting any party against President Tinubu would be akin to Judas Iscariot’s betrayal—a reputation no serious South West politician would want to bear.
El-Rufai’s departure from the APC to SDP is nothing short of a suicidal political move, reminiscent of Harakiri.
Prof. Adeniyi Olowofela, a former Oyo State Commissioner for Education, Science, and Technology and the Commissioner representing Oyo State at the Federal Character Commission (FCC), sent this piece from Abuja, the nation’s capital.
Opinion
Akpabio vs. Natasha: Too Many Wrongs Don’t Make A Right

For most of last week, Senate President Godswill Akpabio was in the eye of the storm as his traducer, Senator Natasha Akpoti-Uduaghan, who represents Kogi Central, was relentless in getting her voice hear loud and clear.
Though the matter eventually culminated in the suspension of the Kogi senator for six months on Thursday, it is clear that the drama has not ended yet. The whole saga, as we have seen in the last few weeks, smacks many wrongs and few rights. The Senate scored some rights and some wrongs, the same for the Kogi senator. But in apportioning the rights and the wrongs, we have to distinguish between emotions and the rules.
Recall that in July of 2024, Senator Akpabio had compared the conduct of Senator Akpoti-Uduaghan to that of someone in a nightclub. That statement incensed the Kogi Central senator, the womenfolk, and a number of other senators. Days later, Akpabio, having sensed the mood of the Senate, spoke from his chair and said: “I will not intentionally denigrate any woman and always pray the God will uplift women, Distinguished Senator Natasha, I want to apologise to you.” That was expected of him and by that statement, Akpabio brought some calm into the relationship between him and the Kogi senator, but as we are to discover in the last two weeks, still waters do run fast under the surface.
The latest scene of the drama started with what looked like an innocuous development on the Senate floor. The Senate president, in exercise of the power conferred on him by the 1999 Constitution (as amended) and the Senate Rule book, made adjustments to the seats in the minority wing of the chamber and relocated Senator Akpoti-Uduaghan. The excuse was that following the defection of some senators from the minority side, seat adjustments had to be effected. That was within Akpabio’s power. Remember that the Senate Rule book does not only empower the Senate president to allocate seats, but he can also change the seats occasionally. So, Akpabio was right with that action. But perhaps Akpoti-Uduaghan, based on family relationships with the Akpabios, expected that she would have been alerted of the impending seat change. And on getting to the floor of the Senate to discover the seat switch, she got alarmed. Was she right to flare up? No, that is the answer. Apart from the powers of the Senate president to change seats allocated to senators, the rule book also says that every senator must speak from the seat allocated. The implication is that anything a senator says outside the allocated seat will not go into the Senate records. The Senate, or any parliament for that matter, is a regulated environment. The Hansards take records of every word and action made on the floor of the chamber. And so, it is incumbent on every senator to follow the rules.
So, on Thursday, February 20, when Senator Akpoti-Uduaghan raised hell over her seat relocation and engaged Senator Akpabio in a shouting match, she was on the wrong side of the Senate Rule book. No Senator is expected to be unruly. In fact, unruly conduct can be summarily punished by the presiding officer. It is important to note that the rules of the Senate treat the occupier of the chair of Senate President like a golden egg. The President of the Senate is the number three citizen in the country, even though he was elected to represent a constituency like his colleagues. He is first among equals, but the numero uno position comes with a lot of difference.
A legislative expert once told me that the Chair of the President of the Senate must be revered at all times and that infractions to the rules are heavily punished unless the offender shows penitence. The rule says the President of the Senate must be heard in silence; Senators must avoid naming (being called out for unruly conduct); and that any situation that compels the President of the Senate to rise up to hit the gavel in trying to restore order could earn the culprit (any named senator) summary dismissal. Those are the powers of the President of the Senate, which Madam Natasha was trying for size. I think it is important that Senators are taken through inductions on the rules and regulations, whether they got in mid-term or at the beginning of the session.
Rules are very key to operations in a big club like the Senate or the House of Representatives. But as we will later discover on this page, the number of years spent on the floor does not necessarily guarantee a clear understanding of the rules.
Well, as we saw it, Senator Akpoti-Uduaghan raised hell by protesting the decision of the Senate to relocate her seat. She was out of order, and her colleagues noted the same. With another presiding officer, she could have been suspended right there. But Akpabio didn’t do that. Then, the Kogi Central senator opened another flank, this time, outside of the Senate chamber. She granted an interview to Arise television, claiming that she had been sexually harassed by Akpabio. Here, too, Senator Natasha was on the wrong side of the Senate rules. Yes, she has a right of freedom of speech, but if the right must be meaningfully exercised, she must do so in compliance with the rules of the club she belongs-the Senate. This is expressly so because she is covered by Order 10 of the Senate Rule Book, which permits her to raise issues of privilege without previously notifying the President of the Senate or the presiding officer. The elders and the holy books also say that when you remove the log from the eyes, you show it to the eyes. As a club, the senate detests the washing of its dirty linen in the public. Such conduct led to the suspension of the late Senators Arthur Nzeribe and Joseph Waku, as well as Senator Ovie Omo-Agege, Senator Ali Ndume and even Senator Abdul Ningi in recent past.
Rather than go to the court of public opinion to accuse Akpabio of sexual harassment, Senator Akpoti-Uduaghan should have quietly assumed the seat allocated to her, raise her complaints through Order 10 and at the same time tender details of her sexual harassment allegation against Akpabio and seek Senate’s intervention. If she had done that, she would have been on the right side of Senate Rules and had Akpabio by the balls. As much as the Senate rules forbid a senator from submitting a petition he or she personally signed, the Senate does not forbid any lawmaker from raising allegations that affect either their rights or privileges on the floor. Several newspaper editors have been summoned before the Ethics Committee to answer questions of alleged breach of the privilege of senators. I recall that as correspondents in the chamber, senators were always unhappy each time we scooped a story or blow open a report they were about to submit. Such senators didn’t need to write a petition. They would only come to the floor and raise points of order on privilege. Senator Akpoti- Uduaghan failed to do that.
But the conduct of the Senate President and some of the principal officers on Wednesday, March 5, left so much to be desired of the Senate. I was shocked to see Senator Akpabio rule Senator Natasha in order; he also ruled Senator Mohammed Monguno in order as well as Senator Opeyemi Bamidele. How do you have three right rulings on one issue? First, he allowed Senator Natasha to lay a defective petition on the Senate table. That’s expressly out of order. In the days of Senate Presidents David Mark, Bukola Saraki, and Ahmad Lawan, we saw how such scenes were handled. A David Mark would simply ask the senator, ‘Distinguished Senator, please open to Order 40(4) and read’. By the time the senator finished reading the order and seeing the order had negatived his or her motion, he would only be begging to withdraw that motion. That was not the case with Akpabio. And to make matters worse, the clerks at the table were also looking lost. They could not guide the presiding officer in any way. That tells a bit about human resource capacity in the assembly. But then the Senate Leader, Opeyemi Bamidele and the Chief Whip, Mohammed Monguno, who have spent quite a long time in the National Assembly, should know better. Their interventions did more damage to Akpabio’s Senate. Once the President of the Senate had ruled Senator Natasha in order to submit a petition she personally signed, (against the rules of the Senate which forbids such), and the Kogi Central senator had approached the chair and laid the petition on the table, the matter in a way becomes sub judice, to borrow the language of the law. The Senate Rule Book classifies such an action as “Matters Not open to Debate.” So at that point, the matter was no longer open to debate. Since the gavel has been hit and the action has been taken, no senator has the right to reopen the case. It was wrong of Senator Bamidele and Monguno to immediately start to revisit a closed matter, and that’s illegal. It is wrong for Akpabio to allow it.
I recall an incident in the 6th Senate when President Umaru Yar’Adua was bedridden in Saudi Arabia. Some senators moved a motion, seeking the Senate to constitute a panel to visit Saudi and ascertain the health status of the president. Somehow, when the motion was finally passed on a day, Senator Ike Ekweremadu presided, it turned out that the motion only mandated the Federal Executive Council to do the assignment. The original proponents of the motion were enraged, but they were not allowed to reopen the matter. They had to go into lobbying and eventually secured signatures of two-thirds of the Senate to re-table the matter and that paved the way for the adoption of the famous “Doctrine of Necessity.” That’s how serious the matter should be handled, but it was trivialized by Akpabio, the Senate Leader and Senate Whip. That’s on the wrong side of the rule.
Now that Senator Akpoti-Uduaghan has been suspended, many would say she was being silenced. That is far from the truth. Her suspension was on the basis of what the senate perceived as unruly behavior on the floor. We are yet to hear the details of her sexual harassment allegations, and I believe that she has avenues to ventilate that. Nigerians earnestly await these details, which should be salacious enough to help us cool off some heat.
Opinion
Now that Natasha has made Akpabio happy

In South Africa under the presidency of Jacob Zuma, any analysis of government and governance without factoring sex into the mix was tame and lame. Zuma was a notorious polygamist who had six official wives as president, many more by unofficial account and 22 children from the liaisons.
He was a kingpin of lechery. On May 8, 2006, a South African court under Judge van der Merwe acquitted him of rape of Fezekile Ntsukela Kuzwayo, an HIV-positive AIDS activist, who was the daughter of his friend, Judson Kuzwayo. During trial, Zuma pleaded that the sex was consensual but admitted that he had unprotected sex with the lady. He then stunned the world with his bizarre claim that he had “showered afterwards to cut the risk of contracting the infection.”
In the process of studying power relations in Nigeria, sex as a phenomenon is often understudied or underrated. In other words, while power relations are known to be shaped by a complex interplay of factors that range from the economic, political, social, to the cultural, including individual characteristics and relationship dynamics, hardly are gender and sex reckoned with.
In my piece of March 6, 2022 with the title, Buhari’s Serial Rape Of Nigeria’s Lady Justice, I doubled down on a sub-theme of the powerful role sex plays in national politics. To do justice to this, I recalled a September 7, 2008 cartoon sketched by Jonathan Shapiro, award-winning cartoonist with the Johannesburg-based Sunday Times whose cartoon identity was Zapiro. I illustrated the piece with a submission that though political cartooning may look harmless, it can be nerve-racking, provoking the bile of political office holders and triggering a huge political umbrage in the process. This cartoon triggered a huge ball of fire in South Africa. Named ‘Rape of Lady Justice’, in it, Zuma, who was then leader of the African National Congress (ANC), and later to become president, was seen loosening his trousers’ zippers for a sexual romp. On his head was a shower cap. Before him, flung on the bare floor, was a blindfolded lady with a lapel inscribed, “Justice System” hung on her chest.
Four hefty and menacing-looking men knelt by the Lady Justice’s side, holding down the “wench”, whose skirt was half peeled off. They were political surrogates of Zuma in the ANC, which included Julius Malema, then leader of the ANC Youth League. The scale of justice had fallen down beside the Lady Justice, with one of the men smilingly beckoning on Zuma to clamber her, muttering, “Go for it, boss!”
That cartoon shot Zuma into a fit. Indeed, he immediately sued Zapiro for the sum of £700,000. Massive reactions followed it, ranging from the condemnatory to the laudatory. The ANC, SACP and ANC Youth League pilloried it as “hate speech,” “disgusting” and “bordering on defamation of character” and then petitioned the South African Human Rights Commission for redress.
I went into all these dogo turenchi, just as I did in another piece I wrote on February 6, 2022, to ask that we must not underrate the power of sex in high places. In that February piece, I borrowed a line from Irish poet and playwright, Oscar Wilde, who said, “everything in the world is about sex, except sex. Sex is about power”. With it, I submitted that the Wilde theory should tell us that there is an intersection between gender, sexual power and political power. This was further escalated by renowned scholar, Prof Wale Adebanwi, in one of his journal articles, where he submitted that “the African man of power must display or exhibit his virility – particularly sexual virility.” In the same vein, Zimbabwean journalist and blogger, Fungai Machirori, urged us to study the sexual histories of our men in power because, from the rhythm of their silently dangling penises, we may find a compass to their politics.
Last Thursday, the ghost of the spat between Senate President, Godswill Akpabio and senator representing Kogi West, Natasha Akpoti-Uduaghan, will seem to have rested. In the relations of power in the senate, on that day, Akpabio, it will seem, had succeeded in showing Akpoti-Uduaghan that, as bland-looking as the old Nigerian pence looked, it was not a currency to be trifled with by the Kobo coin (Bí tọrọ ṣe yọ to, kíì s’ẹgbẹ Kọbọ). Not only was she suspended for six months for violating senate rules and bringing the senate “to public opprobrium”, her salary and security details were withdrawn while her office would be locked during the pendency of the suspension.
If you watched the senate proceedings leading to Akpoti-Uduaghan’s suspension, you would be sorry for Nigeria. Then, African-American Sterling Brown would come to your mind, just as you visualize Jonathan Shapiro’s cartoon in Akpabio figuratively loosening his trousers’ zippers for a forceful sexual romp with the Lady Justice. With same lens, you would see Majority Leader, Opeyemi Bamidele, Adenigba Fadahunsi and other fawning senators holding down the “wench”, smilingly beckoning Akpabio to “Go for it, boss!”
Like Africans, African-Americans grew to know the wisdom which teaches that injustice is a furnace that burns and destroys. The life of Sterling Brown, professor at America’s Howard University, folklorist, poet and literary critic, was chiefly dedicated to studying black culture. In one of his poems entitled “Old Lem,” Brown wrote about mob violence and injustice which black people suffered in the hands of the American criminal justice system. American writer and civil rights activist, James Baldwin’s ‘The Fire Next Time’ also speaks to this theme. In the America of the time, black parents, aware of the danger of their blackness and the violence and death they could suffer, deployed folklore to cushion them, even as they told stories that depicted their skewed realities.
There was this famous folklore told to African-American children while growing up. Entitled “Old Sis Goose,” it goes thus, as I reproduce it verbatim: One day, “while swimming across a pond, Sis Goose got caught by Brer Fox. Sis gets pissed off because she believes that she has a perfect right to swim in the pond. She decides to sue Brer Fox. But when the case gets to court, Sis Goose looks around and sees that besides the Sheriff who is a fox, the judge is a fox, the prosecuting and defence attorneys are ones too and even the jury is comprised entirely of foxes. Sis Goose doesn’t like her chances. Sure enough at the end of the trial, Sis Goose is convicted and summarily executed. Soon, the jury, judge, Sheriff and the attorneys are picking on her bones.”
The morals of this old anecdote are two. One, as encapsulated in one of the lines of Apala musician, Ayinla Omowura’s track, is that, if you do not have a representative in a council where your matter will be decided, even if you are right, you would be adjudged guilty. The second moral is that, if the courthouse is filled with foxes and you are an ordinary, lonely goose, there will be no justice for you.
In the senate last week, Akpoti-Uduaghan was Sis Goose who looked around and saw that, beside the judge, Akpabio who is a fox, the prosecuting and defence attorneys were all foxes, too. Even the jury is comprised entirely of foxes. Though they appeared as unbiased umpire senators, they were flesh-starved foxes baying for blood of the hapless little Goose. And Sis Goose was summarily executed.
First, we must realize that, just like other Nigerian institutions, the power, glory, graft and corruption at the beck and call of Akpabio’s senate presidency is breathtakingly awesome and humongous. Don’t mind his suffocation of these agencies in his most times nauseating jokes, Akpabio has the power to literally turn anyone’s night into day. If you enter his senate as a pauper and find favour in his ego, you could upstage Mansa Musa, ninth Mansa of the Mali empire’s wealth. Owing to this largesse in his hands, as ants gravitate towards the pee of a diabetic, the senate president has the pleasure of a humongous number of solicited and unsolicited fawners and senatorial Oraisa (praise-singers) and hangers-on latching to his apron strings. It is a tactic to have a bite of the corruptive mountain of pies in the hands of the titular. This need to grovel by the feet of power was affirmed by Senator Opeyemi Bamidele. Akpoti-Uduaghan had alleged that, in a midnight call he made to her, he had threatened that, if Akpabio went down, she, too (ostensibly meaning a huge mound of free wealth) would similarly go into the incinerator.
As I recalled last week, immediately Akpoti-Uduaghan leveled allegations of sexual harassment against Akpabio on Arise TV, a build-up began to salvage Akpabio, the King Fox and prevent the largesse empire from falling. First came Onyekachi Nwaebonyi, senator representing Ebonyi North. Nwaebonyi’s fawning is nauseating. On a television show, he acknowledged Akpabio, a first among equals senator, as “our father” and had to be rebuked like an erring kindergarten pupil by the anchor of the programme. Nwaebonyi later came back to attack Akpoti-Uduaghan in the unkindest manner as a serial philanderer. Thereafter came Ireti Kingibe and Neda Imasuen. While Kingibe, who claimed to have driven herself to the television station, struggled frenetically to make her female senator colleague the victimizer, she deodorized King Fox as her victim. Imasuen, chairman senate committee on ethics, even before his committee sat on the alleged infraction of Akpoti-Uduaghan, told the world on another television interview that Akpabio shared same beatification qualities with Angel Gabriel. The question then is, if Nwaebonyi, Kingibe, Yemi Adaramodu and Imasuen could externalize an issue on television and not the parliament, what criminalizes, in the so-called senate rules, Akpoti-Uduaghan doing same?
At the televised senate hearing, King Fox, in defiance of the rules of equity and justice, was judge, jury and accused who sat in judgment over his own case. Second, it was obvious that the foxes had gathered for Akpoti-Uduaghan’s legislative obsequies. It was also apparent that the executioners had been carefully selected for the job. One by one, the senators assembled arsenal with which to shed the Kogi senator’s blood. Chief Whip Mohammed Monguno clinically prepared the guillotine. Spears, axes, knives and swords were readied. Monguno stood up and went into oblique narration of how Standing Order 55(1) had been violated. Now, like an objectionable character, a meddlesome interloper who Yoruba call Karambani, Kogi West Senator, Sunday Karimi, acting like all fawners at the feet of power, admitted he put Akpabio in “this problem” because he pleaded with King Fox to allot chairmanship position to Akpoti-Uduaghan.
Then, Ade Fadahunsi, ex-Customs officer, representing Osun East, began his own gibber on the floor of the senate. While accepting that the senate was a consequential parliament and that its integrity(?) had gone down, Fadahunsi saw the allegation of sexual harassment against King Fox as “mere trivial matter” and admitted he didn’t “want to know what is the undercurrent.” In his parliamentary arrogance, Fadahunsi even saw it as “an insult” for “a radio we licensed” to invite a man alleged to have gone on a rampaging libido to come and explain what he saw inside the pot of soup that made him tilt his hands suggestively (t’ó rí l’obe t’ó fí gaaru ọwọ). Fadahunsi then lifted the bible to reify his doggerel, fawning over King Fox in the process.
Still during the executioners’ hearing aimed at taking Akpoti-Uduaghan through the gallows, Mohammed Dandutse, representing Katsina South senatorial district, stood up, his babanriga fluffing helplessly like the lame hand of an invalid. He waffled so pitiably that you would wonder what he was talking about. After him, Cyril Fasuyi, in his usual kowtow, did not fail to fawn. Even Senator Ita Giwa, on television, propounded a bizarre theory which argued that, once a woman had risen to become a senator, she was immune to sexual harassment. This pitiably suggested that a woman senator must have had enough of men to be moved by the typhoon of their harassment. Nigerians’ mouths were agape.
So many issues crop up from the Akpoti-Uduaghan travails. The first can be seen from Opeyemi Bamidele’s argument in favour of her suspension. During this executioners’ session, he argued that the Kogi senator must have been so execrable in behaviour that, all political parties, all genders and all age demographics were in alignment with King Fox against her. Opeyemi did not tell Nigerians that the executioner senators were only defending their esophaguses in the hands of King Fox.
As argued by many, the National Assembly is our modern day equivalent of the “I” as “We” thesis, the secrecy and single-purpose pursuit cult of the Yoruba Ogboni fraternity. Espoused by Peter Morton-Williams in his journal article entitled, “The Yoruba Ogboni Cult” (Africa: Journal of the International African Institute, Vol. 30, No. 4 (Oct., 1960, pp. 362-374) Morton-Williams didn’t follow Leo Frobenius’ earlier 1910 examination of the Ogboni cult in Ibadan, in the process of which he referred to its members as “mystery-mongering greybeards’.
Morton-Williams classified the Ogboni Cult into two grades membership – the Wé-Wé -Wé – ‘children’ of the cult, its junior grade Ologboni or Alawo (Owners of the Mystery or the Secret), and the the Olori Oluwo, ritual head of the Ogboni. The Nigerian senate is similarly classified, with the Senate President replicating the Oluwo. The senate chambers, which is akin to the Ilédì (lodge) of the Ogboni, is where secrets are lidded. In Ogboni cult, kolanuts are split and eaten as an act of reminder that the Ogboni members are bonded in secrecy. This act makes it very hard for any of the Ogboni to factionalize the fraternity and breaking the pod of secrecy that binds the cult. Any member who violates this code courts ritual sanction. As the Ẹdan Ogboni, a pair of brass/bronze figure that represents male/female, linked by a chain, is a symbol of membership and abidance by the rules, so is the Senate Order book. So, when Remi Tinubu, a woman who had also once been a victim of verbal sexual flagellation, also came out to reinforce the power of the secrecy of the Senate over an alleged debasement of womanhood, it only confirmed the fraternal solidarity of this modern senate cult.
The Akpoti-Uduaghan travails have so many symbolisms. One is gender, in which case, the Kogi senator is suffering the audacity of her femininity. In this patriarchal society, it is a crime for a woman to be beautiful, brainy and, on top of it, attempt to disrupt the status-quo. The penal sanction meted out to such disruptors is ostracism or death, as is in the Ogboni cult. Second is that, as the pigeon (eyele), the bird that eats and drinks with the house owner in time of plenty, the senate fraternity considers it sacrilegious for Akpoti-Uduaghan to repudiate the fraternity oath. The Ilédì, Senate chambers, a la Senator Ita Giwa, is home for the lascivious, the sleazy and the heart-wrenching. As the harvest for the seed of membership of Ogboni is prestige, wealth and societal honour, for the Nigerian senator, it is humongous cash. If Akpoti-Uduaghan is aquaphobic, not ready to face the ostracism that logically comes from fighting a fraternity’s status-quo of which she had been a member, she had no reason to jump inside the river.
For the man of power, sex is a conquest game, won either by shedding drops of a virile libido or the victory of ego over a woman traducer. It was what Adebanwi meant by his “the African man of power must display or exhibit his virility – particularly sexual virility.” As it stands now, Fox Akpabio has succeeded, according to Akpoti-Uduaghan’s unsubstantiated allegation, in being “made happy” through his summary execution of the Goose. For how long? Only time will tell.
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